Memories of you

(Disclaimer: This is a complete work of fiction, though the two characters are taken from real life. It probably never happened, but then again, it might have. In any case, it is what it is, FICTION.)

Memories of you

They were soon going on stage. Again, the two of them together. This time, she was older, and he- he had matured. From a seventeen-year old fledgling of a man he had turned into a beautiful, handsome, lovable man. She could hardly take her eyes off him: he was dressed in black, and the slick suit enhanced his perfect stature, his slender figure. The sparklingly white shirt was open at his neck and to her consternation, she found herself staring at the hint of chest hair that was showing underneath. They were finishing with his hair, which now looked like a perfect angel’s: the curls were crisp, yet velvety, they shone under the lights and small whiffs of summer wind were gently catching them, tenderly rulfling them. She stared from where she was standing, and as his face lit up with that incredible smile at something the hair guy was telling him, she was hit by the power of memories, coming back to her in a flash-

He had looked so frightened, so lonely. They had dressed him up in an adult’s clothes when he was but a mere child. His face was milk and honey, his lips were dew, and his eyes were rain. She stopped for a second to contemplate his face, and then stepped closer and gave him a warm hug. She tried to tell him not to worry, no one was going to bite him. He laughed, embarrassed, confused, blushing. Oh, what a sweetheart he was! She smiled back and squeezed his hand reassuringly. Don’t worry, dear, she told him. You are going to conquer everyone with this wonderful voice of yours. There’s no reason to fear them, as you are above everyone else in that audience, okay? It took her a long time to make him believe her. She was scared he would faint, or act like a puppy, but he composed himself shortly and the moment he stepped on stage, he looked like a professional. He sang, oh god how he sang- she felt shivers up her spine hearing that crystal clear voice reverberate in the silence. His voice was much older than he was, and she saw how his body was struggling to keep the pace. She tried to be gentle and calm, making him do things that she was told to do, but being careful not to frighten him. His unexperienced arms encircling her waist felt like heaven- while she was singing she wondered how she still remembered the words. He truly was like an angel: he sounded like one and definitely looked like one. The timid smile in his eyes made her heart melt, and he was close, so close- standing right there, she felt his hot breath on her face, and she blushed under her make-up. She was young, and she was lonely after being separated from her husband Andrew; she could not make herself have serious relationships, but she had her needs, and she did have dreams that kept her going. All of these seemed to shatter under the spell she was now: he was holding her with his soft hands, hardly daring to touch her, and her heart went out to him. What were they making him do? He was obviously uncomfortable in his role. She did her best to make him forget that he was on stage and that one note badly sung would throw him to the sharks, and she succeeded.

He sounded perfect and he was a success, every night they performed together. She usually let him shine through, keeping herself in the background, wanting to show what a sparkling gem he was. She enjoyed watching him perform so much that there were nights when she got so carried away that she almost forgot her cue. His touch became more and more confident, and his smile, that of an experienced lover. She saw the sparkle in his eyes and received it gratefully; after all, she was a lot older than he was, and the fact that he looked at her not with disgust but tender affenction made her heart melt. He may have started to enjoy the game, she was not sure: but she saw how bravely he stepped to her and put his arms around her every night, with wider gestures, bigger smiles, and the look in his eyes became not only more playful, but also more affectionate. She wondered if he was having feelings for her: it would not have been inconceivable, after all. She knew he was at an age where one’s body is very difficult to control- and yet he seemed to be in full possession of his, like a grown man. The thought sent warmth to places other than her heart, and sometimes, when she was alone in her dressing room, she found herself lost in daydreams she did not dare to share with anyone. Later, on stage, she leaned into his pretend-embrace and she pretended to enjoy the theatre, when all she wanted was to have it all real, off the stage, out of everyone’s sight, just him and her, alone.

The tour was over sooner than she would have wanted; he was officially named the talent of the century and all she had of him was the proud knowledge that she was given the chance to humbly help his way to the top. It made her happy alright; she watched him from afar, like an older sister that she was supposed to be to him, all the while feeling so much more, and unable to tell anyone. He was beautiful and shy and modest, and his jokes resulted in everyone laughing loud enough to cause an earthquake. He always had a kind word or two for everyone, and she marvelled at his inner beauty that manifested itself in a glowing light, shining stronger every day. He was like a beacon, and she would have followed his light readily.

So, this is it, he said to her, with a glass of champagne in his hand.

Yes, this is it, she replied with a smile that he thought was a little sad.

It was a blast, he said, holding the glass but not drinking of it. I am so lucky that I could work with you.

Oh, don’t mention it, she said, a tinkle in her beautiful eyes. She was feeling the champagne, and his glance was even more intoxicating. When is your album coming out?

Next month, he smiled happily. Oh my god I can’t believe I’m having an album!

It is incredible isn’t it? The first one is always special…

The way she said the words made his stomach jump, and he swallowed, looking down, hoping she’d not notice.

But she did notice, and placed her hand on his, fleetingly. When he lifted his eyes, hers were smiling, and sending waves of warmth to his very core.

-Sarah, five minutes.

She started, coming back to the present with her heart beating like crazy. They had finished his hair, and he was standing next to her, moistening his lips, looking focused, but she knew that deep inside he was extremely nervous. He looked so beautiful and lovable! She could hardly contain herself now, as she had been unable to nine years before, when she slowly and gently dragged him away from the public. Undressing him was like a dream she had always dreamt: that lithe, slim body of his shook under her experienced fingers, and he looked at her with a mixture of begging and shame on his silken face. He had been shy and helpless, but she did not care: she directed his hands, and kissed his eager lips, teaching them how to kindle her fire with the smallest touch, and received his trembling desire with gratitude. It had been awkward, but as he lay on her, trying to catch his breath, she fondled him and hugged him tight, her premature and ethereal lover. She knew it would be just that, and nothing more, but for some reason she felt chosen, and blissful.

-Josh, you’re going to be fine, dear -she said, once more, and he looked at her with a tender smile. How she always seemed to know when to send a few gentle words to his scared soul. He, too, remembered their moments together, and when she took his hand to shake it reassuringly, he squeezed her slender fingers.

He watched her sing in her graceful, heart-stopping style, and marvelled at her ripe beauty; he recalled her marble body under his fumbling hands, and her warmth around him- how perfect it had been.

She revelled in his passionate singing, and the way his whole being had matured; for a moment, she cherished wild and blissful dreams of holding him tight- now- he would be gentle yet firy, like he himself was.

When the song ended, her soul burst, and memories spilled out, and her old and new love for him came forth, and she could not hold it back any more. Kissing his hand was the most discreet way of telling him how she still cared, and after a moment’s surprise in his chocolate eyes, he kissed her hand too. She needed a deep breath to compose herself, and her hand, without her knowing, reached out for his perfect curls and she ruffled his hair- lingering softly, reminiscing, feeling the young child in her arms again, seeing his half-scared, half-eager look, hearing his perfect little gasp, the surprise of reaching heights of delight he had not experienced before.

She had to force herself to stop bringing her memories back, letting them die, and she withdrew her hand. And then, taking a bow, smiling, and it was over. She pulled him after her, and he followed her like in old times.

He had been hers once more, if only for a few minutes. She smiled and put the microphone into someone’s hands, and took her jewels down, and turned away from him. She was not ready to face him, and she doubted she would ever be.


  1. Deborah Nycum
    Posted September 29, 2008 at 5:37 pm | Permalink

    I just read MEMORIES OF YOU. How touching. You know, I had similar thoughts while I was watching La Lana this past weekend. Glad I’m not the only one who could see “reminescing” in her eyes as she held him…..



  2. Posted September 30, 2008 at 6:36 am | Permalink

    I think it was definitely there.
    The whole idea came when I heard someone sitting in the front row say that the camera was filming sg else, but Sarah was ruffling HIS hair on stage! Hello?! We don’t just do that… and then she kissed his hand?! Mmm. it’s obvious that she’s crazy about him, who wouldn’t be… She probably sees a son, a younger brother, and a potential-never-to-become lover in him. All in one. I understand her. *giggle*
    Hi Deb, nice to see you on my blog!
    AH you blew my cover now… *ducking* pls don’t tell the others I’m posting the new chapters here, beore FFC! LOL!

  3. Deborah Nycum
    Posted September 30, 2008 at 2:35 pm | Permalink

    Never to worry, my dear. Your secret is safe with me:-)

  4. Krisz
    Posted October 1, 2008 at 6:21 am | Permalink

    😀 Thanks Deb.

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